What I would tell the 16 year old me if I had the chance

Post by Laurainne Marshall for the Kind Kindred series.

image courtesy of pixabay

Being a teenager sucked on so many different levels.

I always felt that I wasn’t made for this world. I was that kid, the one who had aspirations of being a famous musician, the one that only had very few good friends. I was never in the so-called popular group. I found them to be hard work. The copious amounts of make up and the way they treated people, always made me angry. So I spent most of my teenage years surrounding myself with my music. I would retreat into my bedroom for hours on end, hoping to write my first hit song – sometimes crying myself to sleep at night because I thought no one got me.

Here’s the thing, at the time I thought it was only me going through this. But as a teacher and as a mum, I see teenage kids struggle with all the same things I did, year in and year out.

So here is what I would like to tell the 16 year old me:

  1. Learn to love the fact that you are individual. It is often the people in this world that are different that make a difference.
  2. Dream big and never let go of it. Whatever you put your mind to you can do. Don’t ever lose sight of it. Whether it is playing cricket for your country or standing on stage at Wembley playing to a full house. You can do it.
  3. Never let anyone or anything make you feel like you are not good enough particularly when it comes to your body. Let’s face it – teenagers struggle with body image. In fact I had an eating disorder when I was 16. Someone I was keen on at the time made a point to tell me I could lose a few kilos. Snap went that teenage mind and I ended up 38kgs with the possibility of heading off to hospital to be fed by drip. It is about health, not size. This one has taken me years to get my head around. And I would now like to tell that person who set the Bulimia ball rolling: “Screw You.”
  4. Learn to talk about your emotions – don’t bottle them up. I can still remember my mum coming to me and saying “Are you OK?” – a phrase that is now coined to help people deal with mental health issues. I wish all those years ago that I had opened up to my Mum. And I now realize that she had gone through all the things that I was going through as a teenager. Hindsight – ain’t it grand? 🙂
  5. Believe in yourself and know that you are loved by so many and that you are not the only one who is going through this. This speaks for itself really. Well I can see this now but at age 16 I really thought I was the only person who understood me was me. But I now know that people loved me and I got through that ghastly stage in one piece.

16 year old self – the one thing I want you to know is that at 44 I now really know ………”This too shall pass”

Namaste my lovelies. Thank Goddess I am not 16 anymore.


Laurainne Marshall (AKA LO) lives in Sydney, Australia with her 2 kids, Hayley and Jamie and her soul mate of nearly 25 years Graham. Their furbaby is a beautiful Labradoodle named Amber. Laurainne has many roles, Wife, Mother, Teacher and Musician. She believes that life is to be lived at full throttle and is deeply spiritual. Her motto in life “Grab life and run”. She also believes one person can make a difference in this world and hopes that by sharing her life experiences, she might inspire a few people along the way.

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