Dear KOM, Life just happens to me

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This week, I chose a Dear KOM email that is a really common theme. We’ve probably all heard the phrase “the days are long but the years are short”, and I’ve definitely identified with it at times. My response to Christine is below, and I hope it resonates.


Dear KOM,

I feel like life just happens to me. I blink and it’s months later, time has slipped away and I have no control over it. I’m kind of lost and don’t even know where to start, but I don’t want to keep missing moments, especially with loved ones.



Dear Christine,

High 5 sister! I have absolutely said this, heard this, felt this – all of the above. Every New Year’s Eve I’m utterly shocked that another year has passed. Personally, I’ve felt time pass more quickly as I get older; not sure if you identify with that as well…

I wish I could tell you there is a magic solution, but alas, if I had that, I’d be a zillionaire and writing this blog post from my private island! What I would like to share are some things that have helped me appreciate time and lessen that “missing moments” feeling you mentioned.

Mindfulness. No surprise there, I know, but allow me to share my own version of mindfulness. I’m not going to tell you that I meditate for 30 minutes every morning so that I can be present all day. That’d be swell, but it’s just not true. What is true, is noticing. I make a point to notice my presence (or lack thereof), particularly at important times. Let’s face it, if I zone out while watching TV, it’s not the end of the world, but if my mind wanders off while I’m talking to the hubbs or a friend or family member, that makes me feel badly. I *want* to be present for those moments.

What I’d invite you to do is just start by noticing. Set an intention for yourself before important events, be it a child’s event or just a conversation with a valued friend, take a minute before that moment, take a deep breath and set the intention of presence.

Your mind WILL wander. Trust me here. It’s a fact of life, not a personal failure. It happens to everyone. What everyone doesn’t necessarily understand, is that you can bring it back. Use your intention to catch yourself, take another breath, and re-focus.

This definitely take practice, but most worthwhile things do. Give this a try before a few important moments that you really want to experience. I’d welcome an update if you want to share your results of this practice in the future.

As always, thanks for being on this journey with me.

?, Lara

Dear KOM is an opportunity for all of you to write to me with any questions, comments, curiosities, stories, etc. ANYTHING you want to share! Every Saturday, I will choose 1 Dear KOM email and respond to or share it here!

~See an awesome news story or quote that you know KOM readers would enjoy? Bring it on!
~Have a question for me, about me or about Kind Over Matter? Hit me!
~Want a little free (and yes, we can ABSOLUTELY make any part of this anonymous) advice about something from a total stranger? I’m ready.

Consider this a wide open door. Bring on the questions, stories of love, sharing, and advice seeking. Bring it here.

Simply email and put Dear KOM in the subject line. That’s it! I will respond to the email that will be featured that coming Saturday so that we can work out any little details. Don’t worry if your email doesn’t get a response in the same week – I have a hunch that I’ll feature it in the future, and will contact you when it’s your week!

Share your stories, questions and general awesomeness. I promise, it will benefit everyone.

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