Career or Homemaker?

Years ago, in seemingly another life, I was with friends and we were playing a game. It went something like this “What would you be doing if you weren’t on your current career path?” One of my friends said “Lynn would be a homemaker.” I was so offended! I was on an upwards career trajectory, one I had worked so hard to be on. I was in the middle of a divorce. My son was almost grown and we had lots of issues that we had yet to work through. The mere thought of being a “homemaker” made me feel like I would be thrust back into the 1950’s. Didn’t she know how hard I had worked to get on the other side of being “the little woman?” Didn’t she know that I wasn’t going backwards? Oh, how little I knew…

Fast forward about 15 years: in a happy relationship with my true love, my relationship with my son healed and my biggest dream is to be a dog mom and to putter around the house with my grandkids, creating essential oils and happy memories.

I am grateful for the years that I was able to work and be a mom, grateful for the opportunities I sought out and were provided. I also realize that it wasn’t necessarily the right path for me or my son. While I can’t go back and change that, I can look forward and realize that life on this planet is short and find ways to spend all the time I can with the people that I choose to be with.

Nowadays I work in great part so I can spend time making memories with my family, both biological and chosen. I work in great part on myself so that I can continue to emotionally support the people I love. I used to want to climb the corporate ladder. Now I just want to climb into all the snuggles with the little ones. I’m unfortunately well aware of things like sweet little baby Luciana is almost 5 and those snuggle days will be over too quickly.

If I could go back in time, I would wipe the self-righteousness away and look a little deeper into why a friend would say that. I would ask the questions. I would open myself up to the possibilities of a deeper life a little sooner.

Most importantly, I would realize that all of us, no matter what our idea of an ideal life looks like, are more similar than different. I have come to understand that there is rarely a right or wrong choice. There are only choices and they are generally right for us at the time we make them.

Today I send love to all the moms out there; the young, the old, the moms who work with a company and the moms who work at home. I think it must be harder to raise kids now than it ever has been and I see you. I wish for you to grab all the snuggles while you can and to grab all the time for yourself whenever you can. Most of all, I just wish that you grab onto all the love that you have.

Lynn Devasto
Lynn "Pippy" DeVasto is an NAHA Level 1 Certified Aromatherapist specializing in custom crafted therapeutic blends. She can be found on all things social @pippysbotanicals as well as on her website. When not blending oils, she can be found at the beach with her granddaughters looking for the most beautifully imperfect shells.

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