Beauty Bullies

Post by Lynn DeVasto for the Kind Kindred series.

photo courtesy of

I have a friend who had somebody tell her she had fat knees and heavy legs when she was in her mid 20’s. As a result, she always wore pants, never skirts or dresses. She was also told that she had to “make it” in her chosen field by the time she was 35 or she would be washed up. These are just a few “stories” that were imposed on her and unfortunately imprinted themselves on her psyche. As a result, when she hit 35, she pretty much gave up. She woke up in the morning, rolled out of bed, put on jeans and her Uggs, with no time or energy for makeup, put her hair in a ponytail and went to work, doing the bare minimum only to come home and start all over again the next day.

I feel for this woman, not only because she is my friend, but because I can relate to her. As somebody who was bullied as a child as well as struggle weight issues all of my adult life, I understand the hiding, the despair, the giving up. I understand how easy it is for body and age issues to beat you down. We are the same age (mid 40’s), and STILL, almost every day somebody will make a snide comment about her weight and how she dresses.

Here’s her reality, the public face in front of the hidden stories. My friend did a lot of self work, years of counseling, years of self awareness and lots of self love. A decade after she was told she would be washed up, she is a Style and Beauty Expert, has been featured in publications such as WebMD and is a prolific fashion blogger. She is frequently stopped randomly on the street to be photographed for the Style sections of newspapers and magazines. (For some reason this has never happened for me?!?) She is beautiful, both inside and out, the kind of beautiful that rescues animals and the kind of beautiful that is a little intimidating when you first meet her. And so, people tend to stop right there and make up their own stories to diminish her beauty to make themselves feel better.

We all want to be loved for who we are, so it’s time for each of us to start doing what we wish others would do with us, which is to look beyond our physical looks, age, race, whatever it may be…and look to our souls to discover the true beauty that we hold deep within our beings.

To healthy and happy,

Lynn DeVasto is the owner of Live and Love Your Life, which helps you deal with the trifecta of Food, Fitness and Feelings. She has taken her experience of losing 90 pounds and her certifications in Personal Training, Holistic Wellness Coaching, Sports Nutrition and Barre to create a premium coaching experience. This allows you manage your health in a way that works for you instead of against you. Click HERE to get her juicy tips to Live and Love Your Life!

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