Be more of you

Be more of you. It sounds cliche and like one of those things I spent a lot of years rolling my eyes at…and realize now why some cliches become cliches.

It’s not always easy; but being more of you is always a good choice.

What holds you back from being more of you? For most people when you get really, really real, it’s the fear of vulnerability. Somewhere deep down there’s a fear that if you’re more of you, you’ll be rejected. You probably even have some evidence of times when that was true.

I’m wondering what other evidence you have, though. Do you also have evidence of what it feels like to hide yourself? Do you also have evidence of how you feel when you wear the mask that you think others expect? Do you maybe even have evidence of being yourself and being accepted?

As with everything we do around here, this isn’t an all or nothing venture. There’s not a switch you can flip to start being 100% yourself 100% of the time. In fact, I definitely don’t recommend trying that! It’s too much of a shock to the system, and more often than not, diving in head first will do more to reinforce the old fear of vulnerability than it will to increase the feeling of acceptance for being yourself.

So we start small. I talk often about the importance of your people and that’s the place to start. Think of your inner circle people and the 1 or 2 folks who have made you feel accepted when you’re totally yourself. Dip a toe deeper into the water with those people. What’s another small way you can be more of you with the people who love you most? Maybe it’s saying “No thank you.” when there’s something you really don’t want to do. Maybe it’s sharing an opinion that you hold that differs from your loved one’s opinion. Maybe it’s bowing out of an obligation because that’s what’s in your best interest at that time.

Whatever feels like you, in whatever place it feels safest to express that, find a small way to be more of you and start to gather new evidence of what happens when you choose you.

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