Did you know that you no longer need to carry the load of other people’s words, actions, responsibilities and results? Your pack is heavy enough.
I give you permission to stop carrying anything that is not yours. This doesn’t mean that you don’t care, nor does it mean that you won’t help. It simply means that some loads are not yours to either carry or unpack.
On so many occasions, I have taken the load from somebody else. I legitimately thought I was demonstrating what a good human I was; but now realize that this was not at all helpful. By listening to their words and watching their actions, I decided on some level to send the message that they were incapable of handling things when life got tough. It was also simply easier for me to just take on “one more thing” rather than walk beside them as they navigated their own path with their own pack.
The same is also true of the loads that I added to people’s packs. My baggage was not theirs to carry. My hope is that when I try to give another human my unwanted stuff, that they gently let me know that they’ll walk beside me, but I am strong enough.
On a personal level, it has taken me years to recognize this. As I continue to step aside and allow the people around me to handle their own “stuff” and process through it, it has been a joy to see their results. Results, I might add, that I would never have predicted or thought possible. As I hold myself back from taking over and allow myself to stand by as a witness, the most beautiful lives are emerging.
We all walk our own path, with our own pack. My hope is that we all have someone who will walk in front of us to show us the way, beside us to encourage us and behind us so we can be the example of what is possible.