When I was very young I remember wishing, crying and praying to whoever might be out there, “Please let something in this life be permanent.” I wanted something I could trust to last, no matter what; family, love, home, happiness, friendship, security and most of all ~ my mom and dad. I would cry myself to sleep because I knew they were all going to go away someday.
At the ripe age of four I knew nothing was going to stay for long, good days ended up being bad days. Best friends seemed to like me for a while and then suddenly they liked somebody else more. We had money for food and Christmas, and then we didn’t. Happiness never lasted. Understanding life never lasted. I was little but I watched carefully. I knew my parents wouldn’t live forever, my dog or cat either. I knew after several different homes that houses and families were temporary. Ending up a foster child in my teens, and an angry derelict in many ways, I was pretty sure this idea of lasting love or happiness did not exist. After getting really sick I began to realize my body was also temporary.
I ended up wondering about this a lot as I grew up. I was always asking people what was permanent in their lives and I read countless books on how to hang on to a feeling or a relationship. I even wrote papers on it in college. I was always questioning what in the world was truly permanent in this human life.
I often hoped a class, a book, a person or something outside of me would finally fill me up with this feeling of security I longed for. I tried everything to make loyalty happen… dominating, seducing, demanding and my specialty – being really helpful. If someone needed something, I tried to get it for them so I could be important enough for them to keep me around.
Nothing worked for very long. Even my thirty plus years of spiritual studies to know my Self and live from presence, never lasted. I’d find myself trapped in expectation or sadness and angry or prideful yet again. I’d have negative thoughts and harm another with my arrogance and judgement and end up disappointed in myself, yet again. I always needed more self-help to feel better. I concluded this was it, this was life and it was very weird.
Ultimately, I gave up. I learned to NOT trust or hope for anything permanent. I watched the suffering in people I love. I witnessed the unending pain of so many people around the world and I wondered what the heck the purpose of all this craziness could be.
Guess what happened, I found it. That is why I had to write this. I found the permanent! My hope is that these words stir your heart so you can have it, too. This amazing experience is not like anything I have studied, taught, understood or believed. It grows daily. AND… it’s available for free! Anyone that reaches for it can have it.
I’ve spent some time participating and studying this information and everything makes sense now. War, famine, ecstasy, illness, wealth, poverty and yes, true Self Realization. I thought I knew what true Self Realization meant. I did not! It is not at all what I expected and it didn’t come from where I thought it would.
The coolest thing is, I don’t need you to agree or do it. I don’t need you to be loyal to some idea I had of myself. I don’t need you to like me like I used to. I do wish with all my heart for you and your family to have this. I believe it will change everything you’ve been trying to change. For the first time in my life I am not trying to get anything for myself by writing this. There’s no toaster oven, no prizes, no money involved, and no recognition that comes with this offer. None. The ticket for entry into this reality is that your heart feels a nudge from inside.
There is a very deep knowing available, a permanent safety, with lasting understanding of what is happening with people and in the world right now. As you embrace it, life ends up a rich bubbling over of compassion and contentment. This is true freedom and peace filling all of us participating every moment, from the inside. I hope you can feel something stir in your own dear heart so your next move is one hundred percent all for you because you have an intuitive knowing it’s time for something different; and because you know deep inside there is more to this life than what you have found thus far.
It’s so easy to check all this out, give 2 hours of your time to see if it’s a fit. Join my friend Uwe from Germany in a Zoom meeting and he will explain all the details. Listen in, discover, feel, ask questions and decide for yourself if this speaks to you. If you’d like to check it out, send me a note and I will forward the zoom link.