The Confidence Trap (and how to get out of it!)

Confidence can feel like an elusive skill. When you look around, other people seem to have it figured out. They speak eloquently, never seem to be at a loss for words and have powerful ideas. They’re taking action and making things happen.

They must be super confident, right?

Maybe they feel super confident at least some of the time, but more importantly, they’re curious.

  • Curious people seem more confident because they view failures as lessons. They get curious about what went wrong and how to do things differently the next time.
  • Curious people ask for help. They don’t try to hide the things they don’t know, but instead build networks of folks with expertise in different areas so they can get support quickly.
  • Curious people question themselves, their thoughts and even their long-held beliefs. They understand that the critical inner voice isn’t a fact. They get curious about what that voice says, the stories it tells and the beliefs they hold.

All of these ways of being curious add up to confidence. Confidence doesn’t exist in a vacuum and it certainly can’t exist without curiosity.

While curiosity is rumored to have killed the cat (although this cat mama chooses to believe differently!), it certainly gives life to the human. It builds trust in teams and it’s the gateway to feeling genuinely confident.

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