If last week was a rough week, raise your hand. Part of what’s been interesting to me during the last 4 weeks of Sheltering in Place has been the global trends. The week before last I hit surrender. Things felt settled, like I’d gotten used to this temporary way of being. This week, friends, I was many things but not surrendered! In an email conversation with a friend, in seeing friend’s posts online, in a virtual networking meeting…people were having a very similar experience. I find all of that fascinating. We’re in different places, having different experiences, in varying circumstances, and yet there seem to be some larger trends emerging.
So, aside from me being a nerd for this kind of thing, I still had to get up each day and do-the-things, while feeling anything but surrendered. I’m very lucky to have work right now and my work always makes me feel good. Last Thursday was also my day to grocery shop. (I’ve been going every 14 days to minimize exposure and to limit others’ exposure to me, since I live with someone in healthcare.)
How does one do-the-things when they’re feelings go from cranky, to down, to frustrated, to overwhelmed, to tired, etc.? One (ahem, me!) uses their tools. Trust me when I tell you that I DID NOT WANT TO. There was a frustrated toddler in my head stomping her feet some days, but I used my tools anyway. If you’re with me on Instagram, you saw my Friday story where I literally sat on the floor in a sunny spot like one of my cats! Turns out, that’s a new tool that I never thought of. After that sunny spot sitting, I was able to make myself get outside and take a walk. After that walk, I was able to make myself do this writing. After I do this writing, I will see clients. After I see clients, I might even be able to spend time with my husband without yelling at him for slurping yogurt too loudly. (Spoiler alert – that happened last week!)
Here’s the thing. I didn’t want to do any of that. I wanted to stay in bed (which is TOTALLY a great choice if that tool works for you) and blow everything off. What I know about myself is that doing that makes me feel worse. Getting up, getting a shower and using my tools is what helps.
So, I feel you if you’re struggling and you don’t want to do the things that you know will help. That’s totally OK…and I also support you if you can find a way to use those tools. Thank goodness that we have them.