If you have managed to move through life without experiencing any pain you can stop reading here and just keep doing what you’re already doing. If not, the fact is that most of us have experienced some disappointment and pain in our lives – it’s part of our human condition. It is what we choose to do with the pain and disappointment that creates expansion or suffering.
Responding to Pain
I’m not suggesting there is a “right way” to respond to a disappointing or painful situation. The truth is, your way is always the right way, as long as you respond with consciousness. What do I mean by this? I believe it’s important that you feel the pain or disappointment and not ignore it or soldier on as usual. When we respond by stuffing our heartbreak, it becomes lodged in our systems and may eventually manifest itself as much more serious issues such as disease and illness.
I’m also not suggesting that you feel it every day until the moment you are no longer on this earth. Rather, allow those feelings to wash over you and be the discomfort. I also imagine emotions as those soft waves out in the ocean. You know…the ones where you can lie on your back and float along with them? When we feel our emotions as signals and a way to process our world, we become kinder to them and no longer make our feelings part of our stories. I’m suggesting that the first step to letting go of distress and disappointment is to respond by honoring them.
Pause the Pain
We have become a society that is consumed with bingeing. I do not recommend a suffering “binge.” You need a time out from being with those feelings of hurt. This is where many of us end up wallowing in our challenges because we don’t believe we have the energy to, or really feel like, taking a pause…but, doing exactly that will speed up your recovery time. So, get out of your pain cycle and go have some fun or utilize your creativity to push the “pause” button.
Letting Go of the Pain
The whole definition of “letting go” can be very confusing. What does it mean? How do we do it? What it means to let something go is that it no longer carries a charge for you or is causing you suffering. You can think of or recall the situation without getting a lump in your throat or feeling that “stone” in your heart. When we are ready and “let go of the pain” we are also no longer allowing that experience to define us. Many of us have created a foundation of pain and then keep building on it, so our houses are cracked and decaying. Guess what? The good news is that it doesn’t have to be that way. You have the freedom to decide if you want this particular situation, or any situation, to define you. I ask the Divine to support me in letting go of the pain and then follow my next intuitive steps. You can also write all your feelings on a piece of paper, burn it, and watch your troubles go up in flames.
Most of us would do anything we could to help a loved one who’s suffering. I’m simply asking you to show the same kindness to yourself.