photo by Jenny Ingalls Nelson
The J word. Judgement. No one wants to think they’re judgmental, but the really, really, true truth is that we all are.
Yup. Every single one of us. Especially me, and especially on the days I’m feeling sucky.
Judgment is such a deeply rooted part of our culture, and it’s everywhere we turn. Especially in the mirror. We start by judging ourselves, our thoughts, our looks, our choices…the list goes on. Our self-judgments come from all kinds of places, and you can spend years examining their roots.
You can also start to notice them. This how I can tell you with certainty, that I’m more judgmental when I’m feeling crappy. Learning to notice when I fall into judgment has given me the gift of knowing something’s off in that moment. Perhaps I’m falling into an old pattern, maybe I’m not feeling so great about me, or maybe I’m out of integrity in that moment and need to check myself.
Becoming aware is powerful. Notice your judgments (and try not to add more on top of them!) and do a quick evaluation. What’s really going on? How am I feeling? Is this situation triggering something?
In other words, get curious. Get curious about your judgments (especially those happening when you look in the mirror). Be curious about a person who you would normally just write off with a judgement. Be curious about a new experience instead of just labeling it lame or stupid. Get curious about yourself. Notice what you say to yourself in the mirror and pause for a moment. Try, just once, to be curious about your thoughts instead of just accepting them as fact.
Wayne Dyer is right. Judging someone else only defines you, and to quote Michael Jackson, I’m starting with the (wo)man in the mirror. I’m exchanging my judgment for curiosity this week and hope you’ll join me.
Let me know what shifts for you.
Thanks for being on the journey with me.
CLICK TO TWEET Try this for a week with @KindOverMatter: Less judgment, more curiosity. See what shifts.