Letting Go of Againstness

Post by Jo Anna Rothman.


print by ArtbyChrissyForemanC on etsy

Letting Go of Againstness

Change, lasting change, is an act of love. Beautiful amazing love. It is not an act of againstness. Or anger. Or shame. It is an act of love, pure and simple.

The desire for change rears its head. Often shimmering up from a point of dissatisfaction with what is. What is present is no longer working. We see a better experience way across the plains of our existence. We wonder how we are going to get there.

The initial rush of beginning is amazing. We glide forward with a fever. Down with what was…on to what can be! We soar until we stop. Until all the reasons we had been making those old choices come rising up to the surface…ready to be dealt with.

Here is where the war usually starts. The battle to dominate. To destroy. Those old patterns of insecurity, of hiding, of pain…we want them gone. No longer standing in the way of what we have decided is our new destiny. We prepare ourselves, to rid our consciousness of the traders…those loyal to the old way.

We push. Against. Hard. We counter every attack with with all we have. We use logic to dissuade arguments. We use words filled with vitriol to show the voices that they are wrong. We are right. And we mean business. The wars are often bloody. Painful. And fruitless.

The sad fact is that there are no winners. All the voices are a part. A part of the whole. A part of us. Each word or deed done in anger, is an attack on who we are. It is an attack on ourselves. Some part of us will always hurt. Will always lose. If one aspect loses, we all do.

The war, the againstness, is exhausting. The momentum fails. For all the rightness that we stood firm in, we tuck our tales and slowly slip back into the old. The familiar. The painfully easy.

Real change, is an act of love. Not againstness. Each time those old patterns come forward, it is not an declaration of war. It is an invitation to love. They are not seeking to ruin your life. They are seeking you. Your love. Your ability to ingratiate them back into the magnificent fold of who you truly are. They have been outcasts, making choices based on old perceptions of hurts and wounds. They show themselves, hoping that this time they will loved and accepted just as they are.

Love has the remarkable ability to make us pliable. Open to change. To grand, incredible shifts. When the hurts are loved, they are willing to rise into the new, more vibrant energy that surrounds them. They no longer have the desire to fight. They are ready to make change.

Jo Anna Rothman, MA is an intuitive coach and facilitator of The Receiving Project. She revels in assisting people in falling in love with their lives. She is committed to living a life full of pleasure, purpose and enthusiasm. And perhaps most important, she knows the secret to the perfect s’more.

To read more of Jo Anna’s guest posts on Kind Over Matter click here!

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